Archive for November, 2006

Posted on November 20, 2006 - by Administrator

A Healthy Relationship

Relationships are like house plants. They need to be tended to with love, care and understanding. Those who take their relationship for granted pay a heavy price for their laid-back approach.

The best relationships are those that are built on respect, commitment, and communication. In fact, good communication is the foundation of any strong relationship.

You have to learn to share your thoughts and feelings with your partner, even if they are unpleasant. Sometimes the fear of offending your partner makes you keep quiet, and suffer in silence. You are not only being unfair to yourself but also sowing grief.

You have to also trust each other. Suspicion leads to hate, jealousy, and sadness. Often, these feelings get out of control, and devastate relationships. The best way to keep trust within your relationship is to confide in your partner. This removes doubt in your partner, and will not allow misunderstandings to grow.

You must also be honest with each other. Do not allow yourself to brush unpleasant issues under the carpet. If you have done something wrong, let your partner know. It will be unpleasant at first, but will also make your relationship grow stronger (given you haven’t done something so bad it destroys your relationship).

Being a part of a “couple” should not influence the sense of oneself. Establishing boundaries where needed helps preserve a balanced relationship. Love includes many expectations that need to be met. All partners expect something out of the other. But it is only when expectations are practical and both the partners are able to meet them fairly that life is happy and content.

There are three stages in all relationships. First is attraction. When you are attracted to someone, you want to know more about them, their likes, dislikes, interests, etc. At that point you gather the courage to make the first move, like asking to go to a movie or dinner.

Second is the “testing” stage. This is when the relationship starts blooming. If you hide the truth at this stage, or tell lies, then you can be sure that the relationship will end soon in heartbreak.

Third is the conflict stage. As the relationship progresses, there will be fights and disagreements. Those who are capable of handling these conflicts with trust and reason will be able to keep the relationship going. All the others will simply flounder. So, learning to handle conflicts is a must to any relationship. And with first hand experience, conflicts also bring a couple closer together.

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Posted on November 2, 2006 - by Administrator

The Do’s and Don’ts of Divorce

If worse comes to worse, and divorce is the only option, keep in mind these divorce tips to make it as easy as possible on your children.

DO:
DO allow children to openly express their own feelings.
DO listen to your children and validate their feelings.
DO be honest (in an age appropriate way).
DO let children know about family changes such as visitation, and moving.
DO reassure your children that the divorce was not their fault.
DO emphasize the finality of the divorce.
DO spend quality time with each child.
DO be consistent with rules expectations.
DO protect your child from parental conflict.
DO provide a safe and stable environment.

DON’T:
DON’T assess blame. Children shouldn’t be taking sides.
DON’T talk negatively about the other parent.
DON’T use children as message carriers to the other parent.
DON’T overburden your children with emotional or financial concerns.
DON’T make excuses for the behavior of the other parent. Allow your child to see the other parent realistically.
DON’T make your child your confidant – remain the adult and parent.
DON’T allow your children to put themselves in the middle of adult conflicts.
DON’T discourage your child’s desire to have a relationship with the other parent or step-parent.

If you follow these few divorce tips, your children will have a much easier time dealing with your divorce.

Check out these recommended ebooks if you want more information on divorce.
If you are on the verge of divorce, Relationshipguide.net recommends this ebook. It has tons of information on saving your marriage, and will be very helpful!

If you are in the process of getting a divorce, check out this step by step guide to planning and executing your divorce.

And last but not least, if you are in a messy divorce (it happens), this ebook is a must have. It will show you how to legally save money in your divorce.